Don’t listen to your Mother, Speak to Strangers!

Posted by Amir Lehrer

In my last post I started a series of 10 posts on different ways to increase your luck and create Luckortunity. Today’s post is number 2 out of 10 and tells you how starting a conversation with a stranger can lead to new luck and more opportunities.

I know your mother told you never to speak to strangers growing up but I am telling you the exact opposite. Although your mother’s advice was great when you were 4 years old and very vulnerable to kidnappers, pedophiles and other lowlifes, but now that you can hopefully use your judgment about people and protect yourself, you have to unlearn what you knew as a kid. Unfortunately your mother didn’t say “never speak to strangers until you are older” since now that we are older, it is very hard to un-program something that is so ingrained in our subconscious that it is just second nature to ignore people that we do not know.

Although you can get along fine not speaking to strangers and only speaking to someone new if you are properly introduced, you are missing out on so many interesting people and tons of opportunities that can come up. Taking the subway every day, I see people waiting for a train for sometimes over an hour in a crowded station without even looking at anyone else, never mind speaking to someone else. By doing this, they are missing out on the possibility of a good conversation, or maybe that there was a problem with a train that will cause even more delays, which knowing about can save you some time by deciding to take an alternate mode of transportation. Worst case scenario, their mother also told them not to talk to strangers and they snub you completely but the best case scenario can be that they become a good friend, hook you up with a great job or business opportunity or a great stock tip.

A lot of people have a hard time meeting people of the opposite sex to go out with or start a relationship. A major cause for this is that people are so used to not speaking to strangers that they can’t force themselves to speak to the girl at the other end of the bar or even worse, because they never speak to strangers, they don’t have the skills to start a conversation and break the ice.

It is very hard to wake up one day and realize “maybe my parents were wrong”, or “maybe something that I believed in for so long is not true”. The longer you live a certain way, the stronger your habits are and the harder they are to break or change. Some people just give in to their habits and say “it’s too late to change”, some people try and convince themselves that they are right even though they know that they are wrong. One thing is for sure, if these people don’t change, they will be kissing away tons of new opportunities that could have come their way. It is hard to change but in the long run, it will be even harder for you down the line if you don’t change. As always, taking the easy route now will lead to harder route in the future and the opposite is true as well. For example, my 3 year old son is a first born son, grandson, nephew etc. and he gets spoiled with toys and treats and everything else. At one point my wife and I took him to a store and he asked for something and we decided to get it for him. The next time we were in a store he asked for something again and expected to get it but we said no. He threw a fit. We stood our ground and the next time this happened and we didn’t buy him what he wanted, he still cried but he got over it a lot quicker. It is easy to give in but it will cause problems down the line but if you stand your ground now, down the line your life will be a lot easier.

I do speak to strangers every once in a while but not as often as I should. I am thinking of starting at some point to speak to a stranger at least once a day (or maybe week) and blog about it for a little while to see the true power of speaking to strangers. I challenge you to meet a stranger and see where that takes you. Leave me comment to let me know how it went.

Previous Posts in this Series: 10 Ways to Increase your Luck.